6 Reasons To Get Excited For Spectre

The latest installment of the James Bond franchise, Spectre, is finally here – Cue atmospheric trailer, complete with car chases, chiaroscuro villains and terribly mysterious octopus rings (to be worn, not eaten like squid rings). But after 23 movies, several radio adaptations and even (according to our editor) a few books, is the new film really going to excite a jaded, Jason Bourne generation enough to ditch their grubby parkas, dust off a dinner jacket and cash in their casino chips for cinema tickets? Will the combination of Sam Mendes‘ storytelling and Daniel Craig‘s visceral approach to playing the world’s most popular spy be enough to match their previous collaboration on Skyfall? Will the forty year old screen antics of our hero still hold people’s attention? In short, is Bond still fit for active service? We at AP2HYC think there’s still some mileage left on the old licence to thrill. Here’s six reasons why.

6. Less Tech, More Action

The old Bond loved his spy gadgets. The new Bond not so much. The reboot has, so far, ditched the gyrocopters and exploding pens in favour of Craig’s meaty fists – Q going so far as to state “a radio and a gun” is going to be the sum total of James’ free merchandise. Still, in a world where even Barclays offer you a free tote bag and calculator if you join, maybe a back to basics approach to international assassination is the way to go?And let’s face it, we all hated that invisible car from Die Another Day. Even though it’s totally possible to invisible-ise a car, somehow it still seems impossible (and lame).

5. People Elbowing And Slamming Each Other Into Walls

There was a time when a fight sequence simply involved dodging a bowler hat or getting lightly squeezed between Famke Jensen‘s thighs. The greatest concern the audience has was whether or not Bond could come up with a decent hat/thigh related pun. But no longer. The new Bond actually has to hit people…hard…with his elbows. That’s how spies hit people now. It’s either a martial arts thing or the majority of undercover agents also moonlight as hand models. Also, expect a lot of talk about whether Bond is “past it” and “too old for field work” followed by cutaways to Craig’s six-pack as he does one-arm chin ups (Lazy Couch-Potato, everyone knows you need at least an eight pack for 00 status. Abs aside, the fights are going to be way more badass and believable, though we will miss those puns – Shocking!

4. That Theme Tune

No, not the Sam Smith song. He could warble until Jaws came back from the grave and still not come close to Adele‘s sublime effort on Skyfall. No, we mean the classic Monty Norman original, complete with Vick Flick surf-style guitar riff. Technically known as an ostinato with a modal countermelody, we know it better as the dum diddy dum dum tune. No other theme has so perfectly captured the excitement of shooting someone in the face through a nervously clenching sphincter (or is that a camera shutter?).

3. Inappropriate Women

From Sean Connery‘s semi-consentual fondling of sauna attendants to Roger Moore‘s frankly terrifying night with Grace Jones, Bond has always gone above and beyond the call of duty to push romantic boundaries. Spectre looks to continue that proud tradition with octogenarian Monica Bellucci and barely legal Lea Seydoux fighting it out in a MILF vs jailbait age-inappropriate bonk-off. Still, as part of Craig’s pre-shoot workout seems to involve being beaten to within an inch of his life with an (MI6 approved) ugly stick, it stands to reason that he would cast need to his net a little wider than, say, Pierce Brosnan. Reports that Honor Blackman will be reprising her role as Pussy Galore are unconfirmed.

2. A Villain Who Resembles (But Isn’t) Blofeld

Wee can aaall doo thurr voice off Christoph Waltz. Look, you’re doing it now with no prompting whatsoever. An amazing character actor who, like his predecessor Javier Bardem in Skyfall, has the requisite menace and charisma to don the mantle of Bond villain. Moreover, word has it that Waltz will be playing a new incarnation of Ernst Stavro Blofeld, a role made famous by Donald Pleasance (and, um, Telly Savalas). Waltz strenuously denied the Blofeld rumour, explaining that his character’s name is “Franz Oberhauser” – apparently the son of Bond’s skiing instructor. We’re not sure how this forms grounds for revenge. Maybe Bond was sloppy on his parallel turns? Not that Waltz needs much motivation to be eeevil – he’s always worth the price of admission.

1. A Director Of Quentin Quality.

Seriously though, Mendes is a real filmmaker who cares about the work he does. From American Beauty through Road To Perdition to Away We Go, Mendes has proven that he is prepared to put storytelling before franchise concerns, product placement or tie-ins (Can’t imagine there’s much market for a limited edition maquette of Maya Rudolph‘s foetus anyway). Connery made no secret of his wish that Quentin Tarantino would direct a Bond movie. While Mendes is no Tarantino, he is at least a credible artist, with a fresh take on the legend. The willingness of reputable Shakespearean actors Ralph Feinnes, Ben Whishaw and David “Drax” Bautista to be part of the film attest to a director with serious intent to deliver something new. In interviews, Mendes has explained his plan to explore the defining, childhood years of a character who thrives in an environment of enforced secrecy. Hopefully, Spectre will live up to or, even better, complete the genesis narrative of Skyfall and give us a classic end to Craig’s tenure as Bond.

Oh yes, and there will probably be some cool elbow fights too.