5. Now Museum, Now You Don’t!
Much like “Tag Sale, You’re It!” this episode is able to benefit grossly from the large convention sort of format set to the episode, with Jonas Venture Jr. converting Spider-Skull Island into a museum for Jonas Venture, inviting everyone from Jonas’ past, both friend and foe, to the launch party, with a group of increasingly irate former Ghost-pirate crew serving hors d’oeuvres. Ultimately, this produces an episode not unlike doing a keg stand on a powder keg.
The opening of the episode is without a doubt the best part, complete with a sixties film filter, explaining the history of the ominously named Spider-Skull island, as well as the original Team Venture, which was essentially the Avengers, but if instead of heroes they were really horrible people.
Take for example my favorite ancillary character, The Action Man. Team Venture’s proverbial Captain America, The Action Man is a government super soldier named after David Bowie’s “Ashes to Ashes”, with U.S. military issued cocaine serving as his super soldier serum, his “Avengers Assemble!” Battle Cry replaced with “ACTION! ACTION ACTION ACTIONNN!!” most oftentimes said while liberally dual-wielding Berettas at point-blank range.
In addition, the legitimately insane Colonel Gentleman is retconned back from the dead to make a triumphantly flamboyant return to the Venture Bros. universe, with a tell-all book about his sexual conquests in tow. You see, Colonel Gentleman is basically Sean Connery, but if the former James Bond was a proud and out diabetic haberdasher adventurer with a proclivity for giving individuals a pop in the mouth when not abusing/loving his live-in Moroccan boy-toy, Kiki. I am well aware that is one of the most awkwardly depraved sentences I’ve ever seen since Chuck Palahniuk’s Guts, but with lines like “Blasted Malamars…MY TITS ARE BACK!” you can’t help but want to see more of this deviant gentleman.
Oh, and in the unedited DVDs you realize that Colonel Gentleman’s old man balls appear in all of their saggy glory. You have been warned.
