So Furious 7 is out right now, and… seriously? They made seven of these? We’re still waiting for them to make a Dredd sequel and there’s SEVEN Fast and Furious movies? I… I… I’ll rant about that another day. Right now, it’s time to pay homage to a bizarre, but reoccurring theme in comics: superhero cars. Yep. This is a much beloved trope in comic lore, in which a superhero takes to the streets in their own personal hot rod.
Other superheroes have taken different approaches to their choice of vehicles, like Wonder Woman’s invisible jet, the X-Men’s Blackbird, or Superman’s Supermobile, (No seriously, that was a real thing. Look it up. I’m not joking. I wish I was.) but we’re going to look at the road bound vehicles that found a place in our hearts. Despite the fact that most of these could be stopped by rush hour traffic. What, you think Metropolis never gets gridlocked? You naïve fool.
DISCLAIMER! The following is my own personal opinion and thus should be revered and conformed to by everyone on planet Earth. You don’t like it, go live on Mars.
7. The Flashmobile
I know what you’re thinking. “But Scott, why would the Flash need a van?”. Well, Green Lantern thought the very same thing. And I think we can all agree… it’s best if we never find out. *Shudders*. Yep, in an episode of Justice League, Wally West films an advert for an energy bar in order to get money to buy “the Flashmobile”.
Green Lantern isn’t very happy that he used his superhero celebrity for financial gain. But Wally dismisses his objections and instead suggests they use the van for a road trip. You can guess what GL’s answer was. It’s a shame though. I can imagine them doing, like, a Sideways thing. Wouldn’t that be cool?
6. The RadBug
You probably don’t have any idea about which superhero had a car called “The RadBug”. So get ready, because I’m about to blow your minds. Are you ready? *Deep breath*. The Power Rangers. Whaaaaaaaaat? I know, right? Mind = Blown.
The RadBug was a flying Volkswagen beetle that Billy the Blue Ranger invented. Apparently, it stands for Remote Activated Drivingzord for Basic Ultra Geomorphology. Wow. That… was a stretch. I’ve seen some bad acronyms in my time but geez! The Rangers used the RadBug when they found that they couldn’t teleport to the command centre. It can go from 0 to 3000 mph in less than three seconds. Which pretty much makes Billy the greatest engineering genius that ever lived. Go figure.
5. The Spidermobile
Everybody remembers this monstrosity, right? There was something unique about it though, compared to other superhero vehicles. See, it was never intended as anything other than a joke. Spidey was approached by an advertising company that represented a car manufacturer that had developed a non-polluting car engine. Someone alert Al Gore!
They wanted Spider-Man to help them develop a Spidermobile for promotional purposes. And he, of course, laughed in their faces. But he eventually agreed, being strapped for cash, and the car was made. And man, did it look ridiculous. It didn’t help that Peter never actually got his drivers license, seeing as he could just web sling wherever he needed to go. And what eventually happened to the car? It was destroyed, but not before being dumped in a river. A fitting end, if you ask me.
4. The Hell Cycle
I know it’s not a car, but I’m counting it so shush! Yep, it’s Ghost Rider’s main method of transportation. It also looks BLOODY COOL! There’s just something about a motorcycle on fire… it’s just so badass! The Hell Cycle has gone through a few changes over the years though.
Initially it was just Johnny Blaze’s bike. Then it was a bike made of hellfire that the Ghost Rider could conjure up. Then Danny Ketch had one with a sort of battering ram on the front.
Side note: anyone think GR’s due for a reboot? C’mon Marvel! You’ve got the rights back! If you can redo Daredevil you can redo Ghost Rider!