Age of MCU: Top 6 Worst Secret Identities of the Marvel Universe

3. That’s Not Really a Costume

One of the reasons why so many superheroes wear costumes is because it’s distracting. It’s like a guy who always wears glasses and has a beard, so when he shaves and gets contacts you don’t immediately recognise him (Key word: Immediately. Eventually you WILL recognise him. Eh, Clark?). But if your superhero costume is just the same as your regular clothes then… what’s the point? Enter Jubilee.

Granted her ordinary clothes are… what’s a polite word? Ostentatious? Yeah, that’ll do. But the fact remains that it’s her main outfit, whether she’s fighting Sentinels or going to the mall. She’s not exactly a master of disguise, is she? At least Storm ditches her costume whenever she goes out. Jubilee’s all: “Yellow trenchcoat? Pink glasses? Nobody’ll recognise me in THESE!”.

2. Spoilt For Choice

Ah, Moon Knight. As Spider-Man once said: “Moony. Rhymes with looney.”. See, Marc Spector took on two other identities to help his fight against crime. Millionaire Steven Grant, and blue collar taxi driver Jake Lockley. The problem with this? Marc has dissociative identity disorder, also known as multiple personality disorder. This complicates matters a tad.

He’s had a lot of difficulty keeping track of who’s in the drivers seat, if you catch my drift. Sometimes he’s Marc, other times he’s Jake, one time he was a little girl (I miss Ultimate Spider-Man). Still, if you’re tasked by an Egyptian god to bring criminals to justice, you’re not exactly setting yourself up for an easy ride, now are you?

1. I Can’t See Benedict Cumberbatch Doing This

I didn’t believe this when I first heard it. Apparently, at one point Marvel decided to make Doctor Strange more like his superhero compatriots. So they gave him a different costume, a mask, and the secret identity of Doctor Steven Saunders. Erm… okay. Why? Well, to boost sales, obviously! And how did that work out?

The series was cancelled six issues later. Wa wa waaaaaaa. Did they really think that would work? One of the most appealing things about Doctor Strange is the fact that he’s not like most superheroes. Plus, people already knew about a Doctor Steven Strange, so wouldn’t it be a little weird if he suddenly started calling himself Steven Saunders just as well known sorcerer Doctor Strange started wearing a mask? Are the ordinary civilians of superhero worlds just in a constant state of ignorance? What the hell is going on here?